How to kiss (4 of 5)

Kissing After a Date

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   Get close. Since the possibility of agoodbye kiss always beckons—and assuming it’s your desire—it’s best to start getting close sooner than later. Otherwise, you will find yourself saying your goodbyes with what feels like a chasm between you, making the swoop in for the kiss very conspicuous and awkward.

   • Guys, this is when you get the dreaded last-minute-turn-and-kiss-on-the-cheek routine, which is second only to the phrase, “You remind me of my brother,” for most-deflating date ending. As you walk your date to the car, the door, etc., put your hand (or a jacket) on your date’s shoulder or back. This breaks the touch barrier, gently lets your date know your intentions, and gives you an excuse to stand very close all at the same time.
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   Watch your date’s reaction. If your date angles his or her body away from you or speeds up to create distance, don’t try to complete the goodnight kiss—and don’t let your ego make a fool of you. Simply flash a big smile, thank them for the lovely time, and go about your business. It could simply be that your date isn’t ready to kiss yet.
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   Maintain eye contact. Making eye contact while standing close is a universally acknowledged indicator that a post-date kiss is about to take place.

   • If the eye contact becomes too long, break and reestablish it as necessary; it’s better to let your eyes dart around than subject your date to an interrogation-style stare down. One good way to break eye contact while maintaining the romance is to glance down at your date’s lips
   • It may feel awkward to make your desires so clear, just remember that by giving your date a heads-up, you will make the kiss go much more smoothly and improve the odds that it will turn into a glorious make out session. Trying to plant a kiss by surprise, on the other hand, may result in bumped noses and teeth, a startled pullback, and much awkwardness.
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   Stop the conversation. When people get nervous, they often compensate by finding anything to talk about, killing the kissing opportunities.

   • While you shouldn’t try to end the conversation abruptly, which might come across as trying to get over with your goodbyes, you shouldn’t encourage your date to ramble, either.
   • Let the chatter die down by keeping your responses friendly but minimal.
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   Consider breaking the kiss barrier. If everything is going well but you’re not quite ready to dive into full-blown romantic kissing, lean in for a hug and kiss the person on the cheek.

   • Don’t confuse this with a friendly peck smack in the middle the cheek; make your feelings clear by placing the kiss close to the ear or mouth and letting your lips linger for a second, or whisper something flirty in their ear with lips touching. This will help the other person know that the kiss isn't meant in a platonic context.
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   Keep it simple. If this is a first kisswith this person—or, more importantly still, a first date—don’t overdo it. Keep your lips softly parted and either plant a straightforward kiss on your partner’s lips or up the ante by gently locking lips.

   • Resist the temptation to kiss hard or with tongue, unless you've been chasing this person for quite some time. It might seem too forward and shut down future opportunities.
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   Follow your date’s lead. Pay attention to how your date responds and moves during the kiss. If they lean closer or linger, you may be able to transition into more romantic kissing; otherwise, end the kiss by pulling slowly back, reopening your eyes to make eye contact, and smiling.